Castle Moffett, Baddeck, N.S.
Granted, the bagpipe music that bleats from their website is enough to deflate any stirrings beneath the kilt. However, Scottish-themed Castle Moffett is located on a 200-acre lakeside estate in Cape Breton, which should be music to any couple's ears. But if the old-world decor and the romance deals (from two to 10 days) aren't sufficient bait, there is always the salmon fly-fishing package. castlemoffett.com or 1-888-756-9070
Emerald Lake Lodge, Field, B.C.
Adding a vibrating device to your bedroom hijinks ain't a bad idea--unless it's a cellphone. Say goodbye to techno threesomes with your BlackBerry at Emerald Lake Lodge in Yoho National Park. There is no mobile phone reception, nor is there television or internet in the rooms, leaving you free to browse the timbered lodge, wild Rocky Mountain setting and each other's caches instead. emeraldlakelodge.com or 250-343-6321
La Maison Pierre du Calvet, Montréal, Qué.
For a dangerous liaison with indulgence and European charm, check into this sumptuous "hotel-château" in the heart of Old Montréal. Built in 1725, the exposed-stone walls, four-poster beds and wood beams support the fact that it's the oldest historical house-hotel in Montréal. pierreducalvet.com or 514-282-1725
The Couples Resort, Algonquin Park, Ont.
It's sorta like summer camp, except everyone has already hooked up. Catering to 48 pairs, this couples-only resort in Ontario's favourite wilderness reserve is open year-round and offers activities with big-time flirt potential like horseback riding, dogsledding and boating. (She might be threatening divorce, but know she secretly wants you to tip that canoe.) There are basic rooms, fancier digs called Boutique Chateaus and--for the Tarzan and Jane in all of us--"exotic" rooms with animal-print decor. Towel-turned-loincloth, anyone? couplesresort.ca or 613-637-2662
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